Spare some sympathy for Maurice Fox a retired bus driver from Paignton, Devon, who likes nothing better than to enjoy a drink or two in the company of his friends at the local social club. Mr Fox has been warned that unless he can curb his farting his membership may be rescinded. There is nothing in the club rules that forbids farting per – se, but female members feel Mr. Fox farts too often, too noisily and too pungently.
Maurice (77)(per hour) says he has tried to reduce his gas production but his guts are not what they used to be. He now sits, close to the door and tries to go outside when he feels one brewing.
“Sometimes though, they just pop out, taking me by surprise, he added ruefully.
It looks as if Maurice may have to forsake the Kirkham Street Club in favour of a men only establishment where his farts are greeted with laughter and cries of encouragement.
Meanwhile we suggest the Kirkham club books cabaret act Mr. Methane for its Christmas concert. He may help them develop a sense of humour.
New Humour every day from boggart blog
technomist
This is what comes from banning smoking - everyone can smell each other and the flatulent can't light a match any more to burn off excess methane.
I'm not into bans myself, but there is a good case for action on people who reek of cheap perfume and talcum powder.