Forget about coal – fired power stations, car exhaust fumes and methane from melting permafrost in the tundra, the thing that is driving the planet towards destruction is your appetite for beef. The more beef we want to eat, the more cattle we need to breed. “So what?” You might well ask.

The problem with cattle is they spend a lot of time farting, their lives consist of eating grass and pumping methane into the atmosphere and methane is a seventy times more potent greenhouse gas than Carbon Dioxide.

So your steaks and burgers are one of the biggest causes of global warming.

Now you may think this all has a whiff of bullshit about it but, trust me, it is scientifically sound.

Obviously we have to act to check the ever increasing amounts of beef we eat but what should we do? If we all switch to a vegetarian diet we will be creating the methane that cattle are creating on our behalf now.

There is an answer however. We can switch to Kangaroo meat. Kangaroos can do well on very poor quality grazing and per kilo bodyweight the only fart one twentieth of the methane domestic cattle make.

A fart from a domestic cow or bull sounds something like this:
PPPPPPPPPPWWWWWWHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOMMMMplplplplplplplpl.....phft.
A Kangaroo fart by comparison is just the phft on the end.

A switch to Kangaroo meat has dietary advantages too. It is lower in saturated fats and higher in protein than beef. And Kangaroos do not need their diets supplemented with grain and root crops. It is environmentally friendly, healthy and sustainable. Who says so? The Australian Department Of Agriculture. Well who else would have so much expertise in kangaroo farming.

It is entirely coincidental that much of Australia’s cattle pastures are in areas rapidly becoming too dry for cattle farming.

Should you decide to try Kangaroo meat how should it be served?

With Mexican Jumping Beans of course.

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