And in yet another of the serendpititious segues Boggart Blog is famous for we go from fasally's actuon man Gurkas to a post on female images in computer games. Who needs reality when you have Boggart Blog?
In the advertising industry the following truth is held to be self evident: Sex sells.
So when computer games makers hired PR Consultants to recreate brand images and boost sales of their rather tired franchises in the face of global recession related falling sales. The main female figure featured in top selling games was always a scantily clad woman with beestung lips, unfeasibly large breasts and a penchant for wearing black leather knickers. A stereotypical adolescent fantasy in other words. Tomb Raider Lara Croft with her overstated sexuality and her special way of handling a huge weapon was the archetype.
The reason for this marketing faux pas can be found in the PR Consultants market research. The kind of men who play a lot of computer games and consequently buy a lot of computer games tend to bee geeky arrested adolescents. Ergo they are readers of Nuts and Loaded reasoned the PR Consultants. It was a fatally flawed assumption. Guys who read Nuts and Loaded tend to be football, rock music and X men geeks. Magazines of choice for computer game geeks are Science Wanker Weekly and Quantum Physics Porn featuring plenty of hot quark on gluon sub atomic action.
When games sales started to fall a marketing exercise carried out by the Playboy organisation concluded gamers had grown up, Women with pert bottoms and unfeasibly large breasts were no longer the object of their lust, they wanted more realistic avatars of female sexuality. Breasts became smaller, lips less Joliesque. Gamers had come of age said the sex experts of Playboy, they wanted realistic sex symbols not adolescent fantasies. There were the people remember who gave us the shaven pussy, the Brazilian and the landing strip, making grown women look like pouty pre pubescent girls with silicon boobies.
In their assessment of the shrinking games market Playboy had once more arrived at the opposite of the truth. What had happened was reality in the shape of Jordan and Jodie Marsh had caught up with artifice. The computer game babes looked like real women. And real women scare computer game geeks as much as not being in control of everything in their little world scares them. These people yearn for the creation of sex slave robots whose responses can be programmed. These people yearn for the day when we can all have chips implanted in our brain to override all the emotions, impulses and reactions that make it great to be human.
These are the people who would rule the world if we do not act quickly. They would have babies created in laboratories and sex only permissible between humans and machines. No relationships with real women or sheep.
Fortunately we have the perfect weapon to neutralise the threat they pose at our fingertips. Rampant working class women with bit tits and hairy minges.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2009/may/07/games-male-gamers
Latest archive selection now online: Boggart Blog Select vol 5
and don't forget all the other Greenteeth Multi Media pages...
Greenteeth Multi Media
bogboggart
Greenteeth Comedy Pages
A Tale Told By An Idiot
banana
Pro 
But maybe it is just that computer geeks can get sex on the internet anytime they like on relevant sites. When they want to play games they want to get a high score and be engrossed - not distracted.
Plus you seem to have missed that lots of computer gamers are female anyway.
As a mother I would be very happy if computer geeks were afraid of 'real women' - alas the one I have responsibility for is very keen on them indeed. But I am working on all sorts of psychologically evil plans to keep him pure forever.
Moohahahahaha